Surgeon Simulator
Release Date: 19 Apr, 2013
Malpractice Makes Perfect.
Didn’t fancy seven years at medical school? Skip straight to the operating table with Surgeon Simulator; an over-the-top operation sim, stitching together dastardly dark humour with all the seriousness of life-saving surgery.
Taking on the role of Nigel Burke, a would-be surgeon with a penchant for non-conventional tools, perform critical procedures on patients including The Heavy from TF2, an alien with a truly one-of-a-kind anatomical structure, and the 45th President of the United States of America - yes, Mr Donald J Trump, himself!
Known for its diabolically difficult controls (with each finger separately controlled by a different keyboard button), carry out terrifying transplants in theatre, high-pressure procedures along the corridor, and on-the-move operations in the back of a high-speed ambulance. Steady hands? Yeah, that ain’t gonna help!
Updated for 2017, Surgeon Simulator now includes the A&E expansion pack. We’re talking slicker (and often stickier!) graphics, additional procedures, all-new environments, and a (heart) pumping soundtrack.
But then again, we had you at Trump… right?
SYSTEM REQUIREMENTS
Windows
Minimum:
- OS:Windows XP
- Processor:2.0 GHz
- Memory:2 GB RAM
- Graphics:Nvidia Geforce 7800 GT or better
- DirectX®:9.0
- Hard Drive:500 MB HD space
- Sound:DirectX9.0 compatible sound card
- Additional:Requires keyboard. Touchpad supported, but mouse strongly recommended for best play experience.
Recommended:
- OS:Windows 7
- Processor:2.0 GHz or better
- Memory:2 GB RAM
- Graphics:Radeon x850 or comparable
- DirectX®:9.0
- Hard Drive:500 MB HD space
- Sound:DirectX9.0 compatible sound card
- Additional:Requires keyboard. Touchpad supported, but mouse strongly recommended for best play experience.
Mac OS X
Minimum:
- OS:10.6 Snow Leopard
- Processor:1.7 GHz
- Memory:2 GB RAM
- Graphics:1024x768 or greater desktop screen resolution (Intel hd 3000 or comparable)
- Hard Drive:500 MB HD space
- Additional:Requires keyboard. Touchpad supported, but mouse strongly recommended for best play experience.
Recommended:
- OS:10.6 Snow Leopard
- Processor:2.4 GHz
- Memory:4 GB RAM
- Graphics:Nvidia GT 130 or comparable
- Hard Drive:500 MB HD space
- Additional:Requires keyboard. Touchpad supported, but mouse strongly recommended for best play experience.
Doctor Doctor, Give Me The News
Answer the phone.
Flippin' The Bird
Show the patient your disdain.
Surgery Horns
Express your appreciation of the metal.
Valve Actually Let Us Do This?
Successfully use the VHS tape.
It's Life Jim, But Not As We Know It
Perform a heart transplant.
Pinky Swear
Make a promise with the rib cage.
Shh I Doctor Now
Calm your patient.
Vworrrp Vworrrp
Create a Time Lord.
You've Got To Be Kid'n'ey!
Perform a double kidney transplant.
I Think I Got This
Perform a brain transplant.
Nigel The Secretary
Go about your secretarial duties.
Nine Nine Nine!
Perform a heart transplant in an ambulance.
Let's Go Practice Medicine
Perform an uber heart transplant.
Keyhole Surgery
Completely remove the rib cage.
Socialised Medicine!
Perform a heart transplant losing less than 1500ml of blood.
When You Have No Choice But To Operate
Perform a double kidney transplant in an ambulance.
What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
Perform a brain transplant in an ambulance.
10 Megabytes Of Raw Data
Collect all floppy disks.
Spaaaaaaaaace
Go where no surgeon has gone before.
Mother Hen
Don't lose any tools out the back of the ambulance.
Practically Licensed
Complete all procedures.
What Have I Done??
Lose the patient within 15 seconds.
The Sound Of Progress My Friend!
Explode a heart.
I Am A Genius!
Create a Hammerhead shark.
Eye've No Idea What I'm Doing
Perform an eye transplant.
In Space, No One Can Hear You Bleed
Perform a heart transplant in space.
About As Politically Correct As Fur
Give the patient a... scarf.
I Immediately Regret This Decision
Electrocute and drug yourself at the same time.
Trust Me, I'm Not A Dentist
Perform a teeth transplant.
Heterochromia
Give the patient heterochromia.
The Goggles Do Nothing
Completely smash up the goggles.
Like A Wet Paper Towel
Throw the new heart away in the surgery.
Zero G Kidney
Perform a double kidney transplant in space.
It's Hardly Rocket Science
Perform a brain transplant in space.
Like a hotdog down a hallway.
Perform a corridor heart transplant.
I Should Never Have Doubted Myself
Get an A++ rating on a procedure.
What A Load Of Bull
Listen to the surgeon rap.
Screw The Prime Directive
(Secret achievement)
It's In! It's In I Tell You!
...and it was going so well.
Enter The Code
I'm not sure that was worth it...
A New Heart
Complete with either Gold or Stone Heart.
Go For The Optics!
Perform
Hammer Time
Lose 50,000ml of blood using the hammer.
The Beat Of Your Heart
Replace the heart with something else.
Delivery Coming Through
Perform a corridor double kidney transplant.
Don't Be Such A Baby, Ribs Grow Back!
Completely smash up the rib cage.
Is it Real?
Pull his hair for 3 seconds or more.
We're Going Bowling!
Perform a corridor brain transplant.
Speedrun Time
Perform a brain transplant in space in under 1 minute.
Don't Run With Scalpels
Perform a corridor eye transplant.
Call Trisha
Now where did you leave her number...
Mobile Dentistry
Perform a corridor teeth transplant.
One With The Speed Bumps
Perform a heart transplant in an ambulance losing less than 2000ml of blood.
Performance Anxiety
Perform a double kidney transplant losing less than 500ml of blood.
Archimedes!
Hit Archimedes with a heart.
How Long Can You Live Without A Brain?
Perform a brain transplant in under 1 minute.
At Least He Won't Be Peeing Blood
Perform a double kidney transplant in an ambulance losing less than 600ml of blood.
Should I Be Awake For This?
Perform an uber heart transplant losing less than 1000ml of blood.
Brainstorm
Perform a brain transplant in an ambulance in under 1 minute 15 seconds.
Sweet Blasphemy
Perform a brain transplant losing less than 600ml of blood.
Kali Mah!
Perform a heart transplant in under 2 minutes.
Performance Enhancer?
Complete a procedure after injecting a drug. (Must be drugged within 10 secs)
Keep Your Eyes On The Road
Perform an eye transplant in an ambulance.
Grin And Bear It
Remove all teeth during the teeth transplant surgery.
Brace For Surgery
Perform a teeth transplant in an ambulance.
I'm Sure He'll Live
Complete a procedure with less than 10ml of blood remaining.
I Have No Idea What I'm Doing
Smash all canisters within 10 seconds.
Nigel You Bloody Hero
Perform a brain transplant in an ambulance losing less than 1200ml of blood.
Life's Too Short
Perform a heart transplant in an ambulance in under 2 minutes 30 seconds.
We're Going On An Adventure!
Take your radio with you.
Like An Animal
Throw everything on to the floor in the kidney transplant surgery.
Butter Fingers
Lose every organ out the back of the ambulance during the heart transplant.
Surgetricity
Complete a procedure after being electrocuted. (Must be electrocuted within 10 secs)
Frikkin' Lasers
Complete a procedure using only the surgical laser.
And They Said It Was Impossible!
Complete a procedure after being drugged and electrocuted. (Must be afflicted within 20 secs)
Orbital Dentist
Perform a teeth transplant in space.
My Eyesight Means A Lot To Me
Perform an eye transplant in space.
Don't In-Test My Patience
Perform a double kidney transplant in under 2 minutes 50 seconds.
Those Are Some Healthy Gums
Perform a teeth transplant losing less than 500ml of blood.
You're Free Now
Set the Gobbleshaft free.
You Can't Handle The Tooth!
Complete the tooth transplant only removing the rotten teeth.
A Surgeon's Merit Is Based On Speed
Perform a double kidney transplant in an ambulance in under 3 minutes.
Let's See That Sick Filth Again
Perform a 180° spoon flip.
That's How I Lost My Medical License
Perform an uber heart transplant in under 2 minutes 30 seconds.
Moooooo
Heart of a Cow.
First Success
Complete an alien organ transplant.
Best Surgeon In The World
Get an A++ rating on all procedures.
Best Surgeon In The Universe
Complete all 6 secret transplants.
Lumberjack
Cut out the eyes using the surgical axe.
Precision Instrument Time
Perform a brain transplant in space losing less than 600ml of blood.
The Surgery Of The Future
Perform a double kidney transplant in space losing less than 400ml of blood.
Nothing But Skull
Complete a brain transplant by throwing it in.
Just Enough To Clog The Gravity Engine
Perform a heart transplant in space losing less than 400ml of blood.
Stomach O'Clock
Perform a double kidney transplant in space in under 2 minutes.
Don't Even Need A Bucket
Perform a corridor heart transplant losing less than 1000ml of blood
No Time To Admire The View
Perform a heart transplant in space in under 1 minute 40 seconds.
No More Worse Than Shampoo
Perform an eye transplant losing less than 600ml of blood.
Open Really Wide
Perform a corridor teeth transplant losing less than 600ml of blood
There Is Nothing More To Teach...
Completed every achievement. Now go save lives!
Now I Can Reach
Pick the nose (either nostril) with little fingers.
Won't Even Need Glasses!
Perform a corridor eye transplant losing less than 1000ml of blood
Pink Eye
Vodka to the eye.
No Need To Curb Stomp Him
Perform a teeth transplant in an ambulance losing less than 600ml of blood.
Tunnel Vision
Perform a corridor double kidney transplant losing less than 600ml of blood
The Brains Of The Operation
Perform a corridor brain transplant losing less than 750ml of blood.
Blink And You'll Miss It
Perform an eye transplant in under 2 minutes.
You May Feel A Light Tapping
Perform a teeth transplant in under 2 minutes.
Maintained Healthy Gums At Least
Perform a teeth transplant in space losing less than 500ml of blood.
I Can't Work Under These Conditions!
Perform a corridor heart transplant in under 2 minutes and 30 seconds.
At Worst, You're Now Colourblind
Perform an eye transplant in an ambulance losing less than 700ml of blood.
Blinding Speed Surgery
Perform a corridor eye transplant in under 2 minutes and 30 seconds.
The Tooth Is Out There
Perform a teeth transplant in space in under 2 minutes.
Expert Space Stalker
Perform an eye transplant in space losing less than 700ml of blood.
Eye Of The Space Storm
Perform an eye transplant in space in under 2 minutes 20 seconds.
Not The Time Or Place For Precision
Perform a teeth transplant in an ambulance in under 2 minutes and 15 seconds.
Right Tools At The Right Time
Perform a corridor double kidney transplant in under 2 minutes and 40 seconds.
I Can See For Miles... Per Hour
Perform an eye transplant in an ambulance in under 1 minute and 40 seconds.
Keep Fidgeting To A Minimum
Perform a corridor teeth transplant in under 2 minutes and 20 seconds.
The Speed Of A Neuron
Perform a corridor brain transplant in under 1 minute 30 seconds.
Trumsplant
Tower + Steak + Vodka in main cavity.
Little Wet Willy
Wet Willy with little pinky.
A++ is Trumperific
Get A++ rating with either Gold or Stone Heart.
A Small Loan From My Father
Complete a successful operation that costs more than $1,000,000.00.
Barnardshire General
Guts
Ham Fisted
I Heart You
Meat Scarf
My Pretty
Socking It To Ya
Tooled Up
Trisha?
