Do Not Feed the Monkeys
Release Date: 23 Oct, 2018
You are invited to join “The Primate Observation Club”, where you will observe the lives of caged monkeys and carefully analyze the information obtained.
GLOSSARY OF TERMS:
- THE PRIMATE OBSERVATION CLUB: a shadowy group that observes other people through surveillance cameras and compromised webcams.
- YOU: the newest member of the CLUB, tired of your run-down apartment, dull existence and boring job.
- MONKEYS: dozens of strangers who have fallen prey to your voyeurism.
- VOYEURISM: Exactly what you think it is (and also the reason why we’re rated “MATURE”).
- PRIVACY: Something that the monkeys think they have.
- PC (PERSONAL COMPUTER): Yep, we put a PC in your game that’s on your PC so that you can work on a PC while you’re playing the game that’s on your PC!
- FEEDING THE MONKEYS: Interacting or interfering with the subjects in any way. Feeding the monkeys is strictly prohibited.
- SHIT HITTING THE FAN: What may (or may not) happen if you feed the monkeys.
Oddly enough, club members keep feeding the monkeys as though they just can’t abide by this very simple rule! How about you? Will you help those you’re spying on, extort them, expose them and sabotage their dreams, or will you follow your instructions and sit twiddling your thumbs while the world burns?
SYSTEM REQUIREMENTS
Windows
Minimum:
- OS: Windows 7 SP1
- Processor: 2 GHz Dual Core CPU
- Memory: 2 GB RAM
- Graphics: Nvidia GeForce 8600 GS, ATI Radeon HD 3470
- DirectX: Version 9.0c
- Storage: 1 GB available space
- Sound Card: DirectX 9.0c Compatible Sound Card with Latest Drivers
- Additional Notes: Using the Minimum Configuration, we strongly recommend to use minimal settings in order to not experience low frame rates.
Recommended:
- OS: Windows 7 SP1, Windows 8 (32/64), Windows 10
- Processor: 2.6 Ghz Dual Core CPU
- Memory: 4 GB RAM
- Graphics: Nvidia GeForce GT 610, ATI Radeon HD 4650 Series or higher
- DirectX: Version 9.0c
- Storage: 1 GB available space
- Sound Card: DirectX 9.0c Compatible Sound Card with Latest Drivers
Mac OS X
Minimum:
- OS: MacOSX 10.10 or higher
- Processor: Intel Core i5 – 2.4 GHz
- Memory: 2 GB RAM
- Graphics: AMD Radeon HD 6490M 256 MB
- Storage: 1 GB available space
Recommended:
- OS: MacOSX 10.10 or higher
- Processor: Intel Core i5-2400S, 2.6 GHz
- Memory: 4 GB RAM
- Graphics: AMD Radeon HD 6750M (512 MB)
- Storage: 1 GB available space
SteamOS + Linux
Minimum:
- OS: Ubuntu 12.04 LTS or more (64-bit OS required)
- Processor: 2 GHz Dual Core CPU
- Memory: 2 GB RAM
- Graphics: Nvidia GeForce 8600 GS, ATI Radeon HD 3470
- Storage: 1 GB available space
Recommended:
- OS: Ubuntu 12.04 LTS or more (64-bit OS required)
- Processor: 2.6 Ghz Dual Core CPU
- Memory: 4 GB RAM
- Graphics: Nvidia GeForce GT 610, ATI Radeon HD 4650 Series or higher
- Storage: 1 GB available space
Macaco amateurensis
(Secret achievement)
Gorilla clubensis minor
Obedient and helpful primates.
Macaco masteriensis
(Secret achievement)
Mandrillus barfii
Their appetite knows no limits. It's a good idea to keep a mop near them.
Petterus supermegafan
They are crazy about spotlights, flashes and teen-ape actresses.
Ateles pencilianus
Methodical and obsessive: they don't stop until their pencil is worn down to a stub.
Macaco doctoriensis
(Secret achievement)
Lemur wylonii medus
Good, caring, empathetic... These primates are morally acceptable.
Hapalemur dolarii
They like money almost as much as piggybanks do.
Gorilla clubensis medus
Very obedient and very helpful primates.
Lemur wylonii vulgaris
Never trust them: they are the most immoral of all monkeys.
Galago cholesterolus
Generous by nature, they don't let any member of their group go hungry.
Prebytis freedonius
They organize themselves around charismatic and slightly genocidal alpha males.
Colobus corsarii
They love sports and cleanliness. And, above all, they hate confined spaces.
Lemur wylonii major
Apes with unimpeachable morality. ABSOLUTELY unimpeachable.
Mandrillus collector minor
Amateur collectors. They always hold on to something as a souvenir.
Microcebus nudensis
They look past appearances: these monkeys look for inner beauty .
Allocebus darwiniana
Monkeys with a passion for natural selection and the struggle between the species.
Colobus express
Now you see 'em, now you don't: these are the fastest monkeys in the jungle.
Mandrillus collector medus
Experienced collectors. They have a hard time letting go of anything.
Gorilla clubensis major
The most obedient and helpful monkeys: ALWAYS at the service of their keeper.
Cebus smilenis
These monkey put the happiness of their offspring before anything else.
Propithecus molli
Half ape, half mole: these primates cannot keep their mouths shut.
Aotus chauffeurii
They hate moving around the jungle on foot.
Pongo lostintranslansis
They may communicate in a strange manner, but these apes can be very loving and passionate.
Mandrillus lupus
They transform themselves, howl and change their fur with great ease.
Mandrillus collector major
Compulsive collectors. They hold on to everything, absolutely EVERYTHING.
Hylobates silensis
The most faithful, loyal and discreet primates.
Lepilemur poopoo
The most creative and talented, although with a certain tendency towards scatology.
Callimico oviparus
The only primates capable of laying eggs.
Papio stellaris
Their natural habitats include outer space, dreams and rainy cities.
Tarsius amazonius
Big fans of maxing out their credit cards without leaving the tree.
Aotus televisibus
They go crazy over the most extreme emotions on the boob tube.
Smile and say "banana"
Please stay tuned
We can't take our eyes off you
I know your deepest, secret fear
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